If you are a diligent follower you might notice I haven’t written in a long while, and perhaps the blithely obvious fact that there are no posts on my page anymore. And if you’re a new follower, you must not know who I am.
My name is April, an avid lover of coffee and ancient greek, and the genuinity of the spoken word. This collection of writings, this website, I once used to chronicle my travels and thoughts. Though it was getting quite un-organised and messy. And like everyone I adore the simple mess of things – but it felt uncoordinated, and like it was going nowhere. I’m all about setting goals for myself, and achieving something that contributes to personal growth. This was just the way for me to write something, anything. And it helped, rainy afternoons were no longer lonely, not when I was writing. And it felt soothing, like therapy. You start falling for yourself, and your words – they at least are more beautiful than your outside appearance.
I’ve lost touch with myself, and what I stand for – during the last couple of months. It must be the endless exams and college applications, the pressure of succeeding as a dancer and as an academic student. Trying to find time to meet up with your friends and maintain healthy relationships. These are rather privileged struggles, but you get easily caught up in those. Damn errands …
If there’s something I want to promise myself, it is to emphasise my romantic aura. With this love towards others, and especially myself. In this constant rush hour, you feel like you have such little time to give and receive love. It feels like these two subjects often crash; love and time. Sometimes timing isn’t right, or someone is too old or young to receive your love. But I think there’s always time for love, or at least it should be in your top priorities. Share genuine love, not just love that will make others think kindly of you, genuine love.
Love that doesn’t benefit one’s ego – but rather love that benefits everyone’s soul.
Why should I want to become more romantic? When asked, what words I wanted to describe me, the word ‘romantic’ was one of them. I just really want people to know, that I adore giving genuine love. After all, in this new age, it’s all about broadcasting some part of yourself.
I like to reduce myself and others to simple things, so I don’t feel the need to overthink things. The word reduce is rather inadequate here, but I hope you get the meaning. To simplify things, to look at a broader picture. If I were reduced to a word, I’d like it to be romantic.
but how does one become more romantic?
i. – define it
What does romance mean and what does romance mean to you? Try to picture the outside and inside appearance of the word. Is it loose dresses and spring flowers, is it when someone pours you coffee or is it the moment when you tilt your head on someone’s shoulder.
(I’m far away from asking you to alter yourself – just think about this trait, is it a trait you’d like to have?) What does it look like to you, what can you do to look like romance? What can you do to act like romance? What songs does romance listen to. What does romance say?
ii. – love comes from within yourself
I strongly disagree with sayings along the lines of “you can’t be loved if you can’t love yourself” – and that’s simply wrong. For you always have the ability to be loved, and you always deserve to be loved.
But loving yourself can start so many things (I will make a whole other post about the importance of loving yourself and how one should go about that). If you love yourself, not just content with yourself, but actually loving yourself – that’s when you start to be filled with this joy. Because you know you are so lucky to cuddle with yourself at night, and you’re so lucky you know that sweet potato is your favourite food.
When you know each picture taken of you is wonderful, that’s when you start becoming so nice to others. Because you really really want them to feel this love you have for yourself. Things are just so easy when you love yourself.
Granted I struggle with this, but really; try.
iii. – let your heart speak
The heart knows, damn it. Not necessarily the organ, but the idea of the heart. It knows when it wants to say something to someone, the heart wants to give love (perhaps give love, to receive love).
On numerous occasions have I allowed my heart to speak for me, to touch for me – and it has never, I emphasise, never ended badly. So when you feel like you want to say something, that will comfort someone or give them some reassurance; do say it. Don’t say everything, but say what the heart wants to say.
iv. – what regards appearance?
There are no standards for looking romantic, you don’t need those expensive lace dresses or bralettes. There are no roses in your hair needed or naturally blushing cheeks. There are things you can do to emphasise the romance you stand for (if that even makes sense). For example;
Are you genuinely smiling? At your friends, at strangers on the street, at your family at dinners. Try not to force it, but instead find more reasons to smile and let that love radiate through your beautiful smile.
What are your eyes saying? Do you give people mean looks or do you feel all soft and hazy from time to time when looking at things. Looking at the cloudy sky or at your best friends birthmarks, looking at your lousy paintings or searching for books in a library.
Dance? Being a ballerina myself I’ve mastered the art of ‘good posture’, I’m not gonna be humble about that (I mean eight years of countless tendues and pliés). But there’s something so romantic about dancing your movements. And there’s something even more romantic about dancing with someone else, my favourite moments are slow dances. When you can, dance.
In regards to materialism. Should you want to channel your inner romantic through makeup or fashion, countless of tutorials can be found online. Pinterest and tumblr tags. But what I like to do is;
Highlight my face – especially in the spring time. I never contour my face, I only like to bring out the light. Apply some to your cupid’s bow for soft and pouty lips.
Blush – I currently don’t have one, but I distinctly remember the days where I used it every single day. I adored that glow that came from my face, I’ve missed that glow. You look so alive, the blood is visually pumping through the veins of your cheeks. The only times when I achieve that glow is when I’m around handsome guys or when I eat junk food (or both I mean?).
v. – love is love and has no requirements
Despite counting things that you can do to achieve this romantic look, remember that these aren’t fashion rules or regulations one must follow. I tried to emphasise the realness of it all, and getting in touch with yourself and with your heart. Hopefully I delivered it well enough.
Please note that I am not trying to perpetuate the dainty and silent stereotype of women that has been passed on for many generations. Be powerful, be strong and don’t let anybody step all over you. This is merely a philosophy I like to live my life by, I follow my heart and see the hopefully apparent love. But I’m not weak or fragile, I am no damsel in distress – despite wearing dresses and lusting for love.
I shall write another day the consequences of people mistaking kindness for flirtation. But by all means, do what feels good for you and follow no advice unless your heart tells you to. Your heart always knows best, always.
(now before I vomit of all this cheesyness I’m gonna leave)